My dear friend K’s mother passed away last week. She was a very special person and much loved. I wanted to bring K’s family some food, but what to bring? This was not a time to impress. This was not the moment to use fancy ingredients, although high-quality ones were a must. I needed food that would taste deeply comforting. Food that would say, ” I love you and am so sorry for your loss.” It also had to be vegetarian.

After much pondering, I made a lentil soup with root vegetables and my husband, John, made a vegetarian lasagna. I also made some triple chocolate cookies because K’s father is especially fond of chocolate.

I didn’t follow any recipe for the soup; I simply made it the way I always do, starting with a big glug of olive oil in my soup pot and then adding chopped leek (or onion) and celery (or fennel). I shook in some dried Italian seasoning, along with dried thyme, and some pepper. I much prefer to use dried herbs in my soups because they impart a more intense flavor than fresh. The vegetables sizzled until soft and brown at which point I added some diced celery root, sliced parsnips, and carrot chunks. Next came a few cups of Puy lentils, which are the small green ones, not the common brown, followed by three boxes of Imagine vegetable broth. Imagine is my favorite brand, since it has the most intense flavor. After the soup had simmered for about half an hour, I added about 6 cloves of minced garlic. This is my trick. I add the minced garlic toward the end of my cooking to yield a sweet garlic flavor. The soup cooked for about thirty minutes more, after which I seasoned it with sea salt. Then I let it cool and refrigerated it overnight to let the flavors meld.

John and I brought our goodies to the family the day after the funeral during shiva. They seemed pleased. In fact, we joined them for dinner. I am not Jewish, but I love the idea that food can bring people together for a joyous moment during such a sad time. As a Christian, many of the memorial services I’ve attended end with a lunch or afternoon tea. But usually the atmosphere is very somber and the food mere sustenance. The lentil soup was homey and warm and made people smile. The lasagna, plump with kale, ricotta, Brussels sprouts, mushrooms, tomato sauce, and mozzarella, was earthy and soulful. The cookies? They seemed to be a hit.

J and I have thrown many dinner parties and received our fair share of compliments for elaborate restaurant-quality menus. But when K’s father saw us to the door as we were leaving and said, “You have no idea how much this meant to me,” I realized it was the best meal we’d ever made.